Dear Corporate,
Remember the time you told me that I didn’t have the “professional polish” and I wasn’t prepared for “business problem solving”…but I was definitely “the most interesting guy”? For that, I say thank you. Little do you know how much that means to me. Has anyone ever woke up in the morning and thought, “God, today I really need to work on my professional polish.” Or, perhaps, “Wow, it’s sunny out today, looks like the perfect day to work through some business problem solving.” To that, I respectfully say, no thank you. Let me put things into perspective for you: a professional polish has never gotten anyone laid, but I’m confident being interesting has. So rock on corporate America. Tighten that double Windsor up a little tighter and look yourself in the mirror and say, “No wonder the rest of the world hates me. The only business problem I’ve solved is ruining the world economy.”
Sincerely,
The Interesting World
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